You know you're a mom when...

     Becoming a mom is a transformation that happens fast. And it hits you hard. I mean, you would think that the nine months of incubating would give you time to prepare, but there is nothing in the world to prepare for for motherhood. Not until you are rushing around at five o'clock to prepare dinner with a screaming baby in your arms finally realizing that you never got a chance to shower that day. And then you look at yourself and realize... oh my goodness, I'm a mom (and I have spit up in my hair.) Forever. (Well, not the spit up). And it's one of the best and most rewarding parts of life.

     So just to give you an idea of some of the things that have changed for me since I've become a mom, I wrote up this list of the many ways that helped me know that I had officially become a mom.

I know I've officially become a mom when:

I rock back in forth all the time. Even when I'm not holding a baby. When Owen was littler, he constantly needed to be rocked and bounced, so now I'm the crazy lady waiting in line at the grocery store swaying back and forth like a mental patient.

I know I've officially become a mom when:

I no longer carry a purse. I just tuck my wallet and my cell phone into the top pocket of Owen's diaper bag. That's how I roll nowadays.

I know I've officially become a mom when:

I've had nearly every type of Owen's body fluid on me, and I've never once gagged or thrown up. Seriously, being peed on is so not a big deal anymore. And when it comes from your own kid, it's precious poop. And when it's on his dad and not me, it's HILARIOUS!

I know I've officially become a mom when:

I've cried over spilled milk. Breast milk that is. Because that stuff is like liquid gold. And when what seemed like gallons of it defrosted when my freezer door was left cracked open while we were on vacation, it's seemed perfectly logical to cry like a baby about it. And make my husband clean up the mess because I couldn't bear to look at it. 

I know I've officially become a mom when:

I hear phantom Owen crying when I'm lying in bed at night. 

I know I've officially become a mom when:

I spend more on Owen's wardrobe than on my own. My excuse is that everything fits and looks good on him. Plus, he outgrows it every three months so he needs them more frequently.

I know I've officially become a mom when:

I want to call my mom about twelve times a day to thank her for raising me. And keeping me alive through childhood.

I know I've officially become a mom when:

My cell phone memory is full on a weekly basis because of all the pictures and videos I take of Owen.

I know I've officially become a mom when:

My daily routine is planned around breakfast, lunch, and naps. And a naptime has become a unit of time. So instead of saying, "It took me about an hour to do that," I say, "It took me two naptimes to wash the dishes and finish the laundry."

I know I've officially become a mom when:

I find Cheerios on the floor all over the house, not just in the kitchen. (It's times like this when I wish I had a dog.)

I know I've officially become a mom when:

I find myself humming "Elmo's Song" (We sing it as Owen's song) in the shower...the car...standing in line at the grocery store...in bed while I'm waiting to fall asleep...

I know I've officially become a mom when:

My morning coffee is always cold before I can finish a cup. And while I'm on the subject of coffee, I never really liked the stuff all that much until it became necessary for survival. 

I know I've officially become a mom when:

It's noon and my son has been fed at least twice and has on a clean outfit and I've yet to even have a shower or breakfast. 

I know I've officially become a mom when:

I have at least three running lists of things to remember because of my "mom brain." 

I know I've officially become a mom when:

I've had more conversations about poop in the last ten months than I have in the entirety of my life prior to baby. 

I know I've officially become a mom when:

I can recite Owen's favorite board books from memory. "Help! Help! Help! cried the little blue truck. Beep beep beep! I'm stuck, I'm stuck. Everybody heard that beep beep beep, the cow came running with the pig and the sheep. Up at a gallop ran the big brown horse. Goat jumped over the fence, of course..." That's "Little Blue Truck" by Alice Schertle, by the way.

I know I've officially become a mom when:

99.9 percent of my recommendations on Amazon.com are for baby products. Because I haven't bought anything for myself in a long time. 

I know I've officially become a mom when:

I can no longer go to the bathroom without an audience. 

And that's just a few things. For all you moms out there, what things make you realize, "Oh, my goodness, I'm a mom?"

Mommy must-haves and not-worth-havings

    Before I became a mother (as in, Owen was still baking in my tummy), I was convinced there were certain things that my baby just had to have! And while some of those things have been lifesavers, others have been a complete waste of money and space. Here are some lists for all you gals with the baby bug who may or may not punch your Mommy card sometime in the near future. Or for those of you who know a pregnant woman and want to get her something that she'll really need like based on our experience. 

    Here is our list of some of our must-haves as parents. Note: This is just our opinion and every baby is different so what works for us might not work for you.

1. Skip Hop Duo diaper bag. I love the size of this diaper bag. We have the exact one pictured. The pattern is attractive and neither Tim nor I have any problem carrying it. It is pretty slim so it doesn't have that big bulky feel of some diaper bags. It is probably one of the average priced diaper bags and is better than something you might find at Walmart or Target, but not as pricey as a Petunia Picklebottom, which can cost more than $100. It has several pockets of different shapes and sizes. There are two zip pockets on the top. I use one for my wallet, cell phone, and car keys and the other for pacifiers. The two inside pockets I use for diapers and a wipes container and diaper rash cream. The two outside pockets typically hold board books and other small toys. The net side pockets holds a water bottle or baby bottle. And then there is still plenty of room on the inside for a change of baby clothes, a rolled up blanket, some snacks, and a few more toys. Oh, and nine months later, it still looks brand new and has no stains or anything.

Diaper bag perfection.

2. Prince Lionheart Bebe Pod Flex Seat. We use this on a daily basis. It is similar to the oh-so-popular Bumbo Seat, but from what I've heard, this one has more room in the leg area for chunky baby thighs and therefore lasts longer. We have used this when we feed Owen (instead of a high chair), as a play seat when I'm cooking or cleaning in the kitchen, and he can sit in it at the table with us when we eat. The newer ones, like the one pictured, have a cute toy that can fit into the grooves of the tray so the baby can play with it. And it comes with a cute fruit-themed placemat based on the color you buy. 

My mom has this one for when we visit her house. 

3. Moby Wrap and Beco Baby. If you have read my blog before, you already know that I love the Moby Wrap. And when Owen was little, we also used a Snugli that we borrowed from friends. We really liked both, but if I had to make a recommendation, I wouldn't bother buying a Snugli because it only fits babies up to a certain size and Owen has now outgrown it. We now use the Beco Butterfly II to carry Owen and I really like it. Also, it has a newborn insert that came with it for free that we can use with our next baby. It carries a baby on the front or back up to 45 pounds. I would also recommend that with the baby carrier, you pick a fabric and color not based on your baby's gender, but instead based on what your husband would be comfortable wearing. Your baby girl won't care if her carrier is pink with flowers, but I can bet your husband won't really want to wear it. Also, if you plan on having multiples, you may use this for a boy and a girl and you might want it to be more gender neutral anyway. Tim really loves to put Owen on him in the carrier so definitely make sure it is something your husband can wear. Also, once the baby gets really heavy, it will probably be more comfortable for you to have your husband do it anyway. I have also heard good things about the Ergo Baby carriers from a friend, but I think you have to buy the newborn insert separately so while it is priced a bit cheaper than the Beco, once you add that on it is about the same price. 

Moby Wrap: $35. Peacefully sleeping colic-y baby: Priceless.

We have this one and it is really cute and soft!

4. Aden and Anais swaddle wraps. These are amazing. We have had two sets of them. I would recommend buying the kind from Target though because they are cheaper than at a baby boutique. I have also seen them really on sale at Baby Steals.com. These muslin wraps are great for swaddling because they are lightweight, soft, and really big. And Owen would always break out of those cloth swaddlers with the velcro. 

Another tool we used in the colic-y baby stage.

5. Avent bottles. These are the bottles that we have used with Owen from the beginning. Any other type of bottle that we have tried has not gone over well. 

6. Bouncer seat. This was a must-have for us from the beginning because Owen had a hard time sleeping flat in his cradle. In this though, he slept like a baby. Well, a newborn baby. Which isn't that good. But it was really great until he outgrew it. It's also a great place to strap a baby in if you need to take a shower.

A must-have! And for us, it worked better than a baby swing. 

7. Dreft stain remover. This stuff is awesome! And not just for Owen's clothes. I use it all the time on our clothes too. Especially for Owen-caused stains. 

Spit-up pureed carrots, you don't stand a chance!

8. Cloth diapers as spitup rags. These Gerber cloth diapers aren't really great if you want to use them as cloth diapers, but they are fabulous as burp cloths. The cutesy burp cloths are thinner and more expensive. Plus, you can bleach these. 

Not just for baby's bottom.

9. The book "The Best Homemade Baby Food on the Planet" - by Karin Knight, R.N. This has been my favorite book about making my own baby food. It has really comprehensive charts about what types of foods you can introduce to your baby each month and includes a lot of other cool tips too. It also tells you which recipes can be frozen and how long they can last in the fridge. I just love it. 

    And as a bonus, here is another must-have item regarding making your own baby food. The Beaba Multi-portion Freezer Tray. It is made by the company that makes the special baby food maker (more on that later in this post) and it can be used to freeze 2-3 oz. portions of baby food. I only have one tray and I think that is enough because they are kind-of expensive. I use it initially to freeze the puree and then I transfer them into a labeled Ziploc freezer bag. The lid does not stay on close enough to prevent air from getting in there and causing freezer burn so I wouldn't store food in it longterm. The frozen food also pops out really easily from the container.

10. BOPPY pillow. This is a must-have! I know, I know, our mothers got by just fine without them, but I really loved ours. It can be used in a lot of different ways in addition to propping a baby on it while you are feeding him. We have the exact one pictured and I really like it because it is super soft. 

Because a baby can get really heavy while you're feeding them.

11. Chicco Keyfit 30 Infant Car Seat. I really love our car seat. We have the exact one pictured and have really loved it from the beginning. I remember sending Tim out to the garage when I was about 32 weeks pregnant to install the carseat thinking that I would be hearing curse words momentarily, but he came in just three or four minutes later and had it already installed. It is so easy! Even I can do it. It's especially easy if you have a car made within the past 10 years or so because they have the latch system and you just snap two buckles into the metal clip that is welded into the seat frame (in case you were wondering what the heck those things were in your car, that's what they're for!) Adjust the level of the carseat with a bright orange button and you're done!

I love the pretty gender neutral green!

    And here is a list of some of the products that we bought Owen or had on our registry that didn't turn out to be worth the money. Or products that might not be useful depending on your circumstances. 

1. Baby bath robes, towels, etc. - While all these things may be oh so cute and adorable, they are a complete waste of money. And to tell you the truth, the towels are so thin they couldn't dry a dish, much less a baby. (We had the Circo brand towels from Target). After learning that fact, we still use baby wash cloths (Carter's makes the best ones), but we always dry Owen with a regular towel. And you know what? Wrapping him up in a giant snuggly soft adult-sized towel is twice as cute as trying to wrap him in a teeny paper thin, yet colorful towel with fish on it. Also, a note on baby bath robes. Owen has worn his maybe twice. And only for photo ops. 

Cute, but worthless.

2. Cloud B Sleep Sheep. Oh so adorable, right? A magic sheep that will make a baby fall asleep instantly. Complete with the sound of a toilet flushing (gentle stream) and mating whale calls. Now, who decided that was what made a baby go to sleep? As far as I know, Owen has never seen or heard a whale before so why would that soothe him? Now, don't get me wrong, this was great for us when Owen slept in our room because we had trouble sleeping through his little newborn snorts and snores, but a cheap $10 noise machine would have done the trick just fine. 

A sheep that makes whale noises. Way to confuse our kids early, Cloud B.

3. Baby monitor. Now this isn't really a waste of money. They definitely come in handy once you've moved your baby into their own room. But if you, like us, live in a house small enough that you can hear your baby cry from the opposite side of house in his nursery, you don't really need a baby monitor. (Plus, when you become a mom you automatically become a super light sleeper anyway). We will save the one we have of course for future babies and future (bigger) houses, but at the moment we don't need ours. So if you are trying to save a few bucks when getting ready for baby, if your house is small or if your bedroom is close to the baby's room, don't bother investing in a baby monitor right away. 

Don't buy unless you have a BIG house!

4. Gumdrop pacifiers. These things are ridiculous. They weigh about a pound each so Owen was never able to keep it in his mouth. I'd put it in and it would just drop out. So don't buy a bunch of these thinking that they are the thing to have because you've always seen babies at the hospital with them. Our hospital actually didn't use this kind. My advice is to see what kind the hospital gives you and then go from there if your baby seems to even want to use one. We personally like the Avent brand kind. 

Cute, but heavy.

5.  Receiving blankets. They may be cute, but unless your baby weighs four pounds, there is no way you can use it to swaddle or wrap your baby in it. We used ours a few times to wrap around Owen's legs when he was in his carseat, but otherwise those flannel receiving blankets don't do much good. My advice is to have swaddling blankets (see above) and maybe one of those cute, thick, and fuzzy blankets for snuggling. 

Too small to do any good.

6. Pee-pee Teepees. If you are having a boy, these are so very cute. And tee-hee-inducing. But actually aren't really worth the effort. And unless your baby never moves, it won't stay on long enough to do any good. And at $12 a pop, I'm ashamed I ever put them on my baby registry. 

A party hat for your baby's private parts!

7. Newborn-sized clothes - We only had a couple newborn-sized clothes thankfully, but they are majorly too small. We got by just fine with size 3 months and size 0-3 months clothing. They were a little too big for newborn baby Owen, but we got a lot more mileage out of them than if we were to have bought a lot of newborn-sized clothes. So unless you have a preemie, I wouldn't bother buying a lot of newborn-sized stuff. On a side note, here is a little lesson on baby clothes sizes because they can be confusing. If a clothing item has a single size on it like 3 months or the number 3, it means it will fit the average-sized baby up until they are three months old. So don't wait until your baby is three months old to wear it because chances are he will have already outgrown it. If the garment has a range of sizes, like 3-6 months, then obviously it fits an average 3-6 month old.   

So cute...for about a week and a half.

8. Special baby food makers - I really enjoy making Owen's baby food at home and I really wanted one of these when I first started. I thought it was a necessity. But it turns out, I have everything that I need to make baby food in my kitchen already. Pots and pans, a microwave, and a blender. So unless you have $120 to burn, I wouldn't bother buying it. 

The KitchenAid mixer of baby food makers. Looks cool on the counter, but not a necessity.

     And a couple of other things that I never owned myself, but heard from friends were a waste are shopping cart covers and baby wipes warmers.
     On the other hand, there have been some baby products that I thought were pretty useless, but that have actually turned out to be great to have. 


1. A pacifier clip. Originally, I just thought this was sort-of a pointless purchase, but after picking up Owen's pacifier off of the disgusting grocery store/airport/gas station/bathroom/etc. floor, I am so grateful for it. The kid seems to immediately spit those suckers out onto the asphalt as soon as I get him out of the car seat. Also, in church nursery, it never fails that when they need it, the nursery workers cannot ever seem to find a pacifier in his diaper bag (top pouch generally has at least two, but with several pockets in his diaper bag I guess I can't blame them), so now I just clip it to him when I drop him off. 

2. Boogie Wipes. Yes, the concept seems as ridiculous as the name, but they really are great when Owen has a stuffy or runny nose. The saline helps to gently break up his dry boogers. Owen still hates to have his nose wiped, but these at least make it quicker.

3. Diaper Genie II Diaper Pail. Tim initially thought this was overkill and too expensive. But now after some of the diapers we've had to change, he's actually happy that we have it. It really keeps the smell down and if you don't twist the bag to contain each diaper separately in the plastic bag, you won't have to spend as much on refills. And it still keeps the smell in just fine. If you like, you can twist it only after really stinky diapers and not after plain No. 1 diapers. 

   So there are some of my recommendations as a mom. What are some of the baby products you couldn't live without? And what was a waste of money or space?

What I've learned so far

      As we start the new year, it's hard to believe that I've been a mom for nine months. A year ago today, we were on a plane to Washington and I was 25 weeks pregnant. And now here we are with arguably the cutest, most hilarious and precious 9-month-old boy. Our life has changed so much in just a year. And I have learned so much in that time. And because we are so far away from family, a lot of it has been trial and error and figuring things out for ourselves. It still amazes me that they let us leave the hospital with a baby. But it's amazing how just by becoming a mom, you know so much instinctually. Here are some of the things I've learned in the past nine months as a mom.


1. The first two months are the hardest. Once you get through that, you can get through anything. Even teething. 
2. Every baby is soothed in a different way. And things that didn't work initially can suddenly begin working, so don't throw that baby swing out just because it doesn't work the first time. When you get about a month in and your baby is going through the "colic" stage, try any and all combinations of swaddling, pacifiers, rocking, bouncing, sound machines, and shushing. Eventually you will figure out just the right method for your baby and you will feel like Superwoman.
3. It's okay to stand your ground. Whether this be with a family member, your spouse, the pediatrician, etc. I am Owen's No. 1 advocate and I have no problem pissing anyone off to do what is best for him.
4. Having a baby can be hard on a marriage. But if you see it as a new way to partner with your husband in the greatest parenting team ever, you can grow even closer. Work together, laugh together, and tag team whenever you're exhausted and cranky. 
5. Take lots of pictures. And try to keep track of firsts and other details whenever you get a chance. It's so hard to remember everything. And FYI, pregnancy brain becomes mom brain. So for all you organized girls out there who have it all together (like pre-baby me), enjoy it while it lasts. For me now, the monthly blog post updates on Owen's progress are a way for me to not only keep everyone else updated, it's serves as a way that I can go back and remember things so I can fill in Owen's baby book when I get the chance. 
6. At the same time, don't spend so much time documenting everything that you don't actually experience it! Snap a few pictures and then be in the moment!
7. For those of you who do want to have an entire photo session with your baby every once in a while, do it immediately after they've eaten and had a nap. And work fast. Be prepared with an arsenal of amusing noises and facial expressions. And don't be disappointed if a photo session doesn't go exactly as you would have liked. Perfect pictures don't always have to include a smile. Someday you will treasure that precious photo of a yawn or a baby who has fallen asleep mid-shoot or is crying as hard as a tiny newborn can with his fists all balled up (believe me, when they graduate to screaming banshee cry, you will miss that pitiful newborn cry). 
8. Don't feel guilty if you can't breastfeed. The mothering community will tell you that "breast is best" and do its best to make you feel inadequate and horrible. But there are numerous ways to make sure a baby is fed and you can only do what works for you and your baby. For me, that meant pumping for nine months and counting with the occasional bottle of formula to supplement. This same concept can apply to anything having to do with parenting really. So whether you disposable diaper or cloth diaper, formula feed or breast feed, co-sleep or not, rock your baby to sleep every night or let them cry-it-out, rest assured that as long as you are doing what you think is best, what other people think doesn't matter.
8. Love on your baby. Ensure that they know that they are the most important thing in the whole world and that you will love them unconditionally. Tim and I give as much of our attention as we can to Owen when he is awake, and once he's finally asleep, that's when we take time to do things for ourselves. 
9. Distract and disorient! This is the best method to calm Owen down when he is upset. Give him a toy or sing a song or whatever it takes to take their mind off whatever made them mad to begin with. 
10. Don't freak out every time your baby bumps his head or falls down. Many times Owen will look up at me after doing so to see my reaction before he decides whether to cry or not. If I'm not rushing over to check on him or appearing concerned, he generally goes back to playing. 
11. Learn to laugh at yourself. Because when you're exhausted and covered in poop, it's better to do that than to cry. And when your baby is refusing to eat peas for the five billionth time and you want to cry watching your hard work (there's breast milk in there!) flung across the counter, relax and let him play with his food. You'll get some great photos. 
12. Share your baby with others. I see lots of mothers continue to carry their baby into church services with them when they are old enough to be in the nursery. It's good for babies to be around other people and other babies. I think mothers who raise their babies to be solely dependent on them are crazy. And also probably really tired.
13. It's not a mom-petition. I think it's easy to compare yourself and your baby to others, but it is so important to find other mothers for the support and it's a waste to worry about whether you're worse or better than them. 99.9 % of moms want the best for their kids so there's no point in comparing.
14. Your baby's cry affects you more than it does anyone else. So when you're freaking out because he is crying in public or on an airplane, it really isn't bothering others as much as you might think. Also, we are really good at flying with a baby, but I could do an entire post on that so I won't out anything on here about it.
15. Babies grow up too fast. 


So there you have it. A little list of some of the things that I have learned since I became a mom somewhere between this

and this.